Can Someone Please Explain the New Beyoncé Wax Figure to Us?

Here we freakin’ go again.

Ladies and gentlemen, there is photographic evidence that some humans in the world do not know who Beyoncé is and have, in fact, never actually seen her. Behold:

Yes, this figurine—with chunky Kate Gosselin-esque blonde streaks and a name tag that makes her more look like a tour guide at the wax museum, than one of its “works of art”—is indeed supposed to be the likeness of actual queen Beyoncé (and we have writer Ama Scriver to thank for the original snap). So, naturally, the only plausible explanation for such an atrocity is that the poor wax figure artiste has never actually seen what Bey looks like. Otherwise, how could one explain a statue that looks so little like Beyoncé and so much like, oh I don’t know, a cross between Lindsay Lohan and vintage Vanna White? An early aughts Jessica Simpson? Or as so astutely noted by writer Kashana Cauley, Kaitlin Olson of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia fame?

(And on a serious note, why does it seem so difficult for wax museums to accurately portray the *correct* skin colour of Black celebrities, specifically? Whitewashing celebrity wax figurines isn’t cool, period.)

The ghastly affront to the vision that is Beyoncé is a new addition to the Louis Tussaud’s Waxworks in Niagara Falls, and we’ll be driving over there asap to remove it. JK (but like, not). The internet has taken notice and cosigns our shock and dismay.

This, of course, isn’t the first time a celebrity’s wax likeness looked 0 percent like them (lest we forget the great Ryan Gosling monstrosity of 2017), and hell, it isn’t even the first time Beyoncé’s likeness has been done so, so dirty. It’s *also* not the only tragic wax mess at this museum—you will never be able to un-see what they did to Pamela Anderson—and is the SECOND time they’ve made a mockery out of Beyoncé herself.

Can we stop trying to carve this queen out of wax and just cancel Louis Tussaud’s already?